This past summer has been a hard one for me. My life seems to have taken a winding path
that is rapidly becoming harder to travel upon.
In many areas I am having to readjust my focus. And my perspective on things is in need of
some change so that I can achieve new goals, which isn’t easy for me because I
am a person that struggles with change.
What better time to write this when I am tucked up in bed with a cold?
Growing up is hard on all people, I think. Why else would there be so many books,
movies, and songs written about coming of age?
I am coming of age right now, and frankly, half of me hates it while my optimistic side says, “This is a good thing.
You are taking the first big leaps into adulthood.”
Maybe it would help if I described my reluctance of change
by using a diet plan as an example. When
you first start out on a healthy diet you are thrilled to be on the right
track, but agonizing for a piece of pizza. Wretchedly, you long for the pizza all day long, even though your mind acknowledges
the fact that the salad is better and more nutritionally fulfilling for you than
the carbs with cheese. This explains my
sore feelings for change. Mentally I
know that these new things in my life are good for me, that I should embrace
these changes with open arms. Why do I feel so miserable though?
Change isn’t something that I always despise. In many ways I welcome change into my life,
whether it means a new refrigerator, a new acquaintance, or a new pair of
pretty shoes. Change can be a really
wonderful thing and we need it daily in order for us to grow, but I find a part of
myself missing the good ol’ times, before all this “change” came.
I miss the years that I lived in Texas. My childhood years in particular were so
pleasant and joyful. I grew up with lots
of siblings, a big back yard to play around, and lots of friends my age that
loved to play dolls, and just a nice all around nice day-to-day childhood. These are my memories, even the sad ones, and
I value them highly. I will never forget
the thrill of taking a book out the library for the first time, or the
enjoyment playing "Pioneers and Indians" in the backyard with my sisters, or the
excitement of a water balloon fight.
I feel, if I can recall enough of those memories, that I can move forward with the changing times, while still remembering how wonderful the old times were. As happy as I was, I can never go back to the past. But I
can walk forward in an attitude of hope and do my best in my changing life.
Now excuse me, as I need some time to hang out with a Kleenex box. *achoo!*
10 comments:
I don't like change either,but it is necessary sometimes.
You are very right.
I do like change as in the changing seasons or the changing fashions. Things like that are absolutely great! :)
I miss you being in Texas too! Now I need a tissue.
You have a cold? Aw! I hate being sick. I just had a pretty nasty cold last week!!! Usually colds don't come around too much in the summer so that's unusual that we both got sick. Sadly, I didn't get any Kleenex until I was on the mends...*pout*
I hope you get better real soon. =D
Aww...you had a cold too? I hate being sick, unless it means that I can take some time off from studying. ;)
I think that the thing that I really miss the most about Texas is being able to go to the park with your family. I miss that and the old house that I was born in. Those days I really miss.
That's true. The best time I've had while I was sick was last year, when I had strep throat (but trust me, you DO NOT want strep throat!!!). I watched movies for four days straight! Hehe. ;D
Yes! Park days! Those were so fun.
Do you remember the time (well, we probably did it more than once) we played Capture the Flag?
Yep. I miss those days too.
I remember Capture the Flag! Who won? I don't think that it was me.
*laughing*
I don't remember either! That was....*counting*....hm, I guess around six or seven years ago!!! Wow! I didn't realize it was that long ago!
I doubt it was my team. I don't even remember who was on my team, though.
Those are great memories but it makes me sad too, I guess. *sniffle*. (This computer really needs smileys! Ha!)
Maybe someday we will get together and go to the park again. Well, maybe we might just talk. *wink*
Annie might remember...maybe?
:)
Annie says that she won. :D
*laughing again*
Probably. She is fast and sneaky! Or at least she was back when we played that game....I don't really know about now. :D
I'm thinking that I was probably on her team, so does that make me a winner too? *wink*
:D
Post a Comment